Artist Statement
I have this vivid memory of my mother telling me, “what we do around each other is far more important than what we do to each other,” which always resurfaces when I think about my art. I imagine her clear as day walking towards the blurred kitchen of what is about to be our fifth old apartment and eighth move in my lifetime.
It is not the relocating itself that affects me, but the keeping and tossing, sorting, and boxing that surrounds my development as a young adult. Yet by virtue of situations beyond my control, I am often unable to participate in these transitions with my family. This resulted in navigating my identity through a very disjointed lens – each phase defined by newness but lacking the process that led me there.
In contrast, my artmaking is extremely process heavy, and I credit this to my recovery. When I got clean in 2022, I found myself confronted by my unmanageable landfill of a life as well as an extremely compartmentalized sense of self. I turned to compression-based art media such as printmaking, weaving, and papermaking in hopes that their “many-into-one-ness” could help me reconnect.
Recovery also unearthed a whole new obstacle in my life – climate anxiety. All too quickly, my shame as a consumer became synonymous with my deep internal shame. But this also meant that my journey of self-rediscovery transformed into an exciting fascination with trash and what it even was: What internal value system decrees precious vs disposable or fresh vs rotten?
My art practice challenges my definition of trash through the routine reuse of my own artwork, possessions, and found objects. Not only does this combat the seeming helplessness of the climate crisis, but it feeds the keeping, tossing, sorting, and unboxing experience that I need to move forward in life. Yet I often worry that juggling these two major themes means one is always concealing the other. The piece “Coming Out The Other End, Still A Piece Of Garbage” is my best attempt at creating a space for both to coexist.
My thesis exhibition is a 15 by 15-foot installation of 475 sheets of handmade paper and 980 paper beads made entirely from my art waste. The piece represents my desire to find a fresh start in college while remaining connected to all my previous life experiences. It is also a testament to just how much garbage is contained in a tiny fraction of my waste footprint. I encourage viewers to read the piece description and discover all the trashicals hidden and compressed within the sheets. Just for today, enjoy the wonderful potential of garbage.
